Forgiveness is a decision of the will. Since God commands us to forgive, we must make a conscious choice to obey God and forgive. Of course, it is impossible to truly forget sins that have been committed against us. We cannot selectively “delete” events from our memory.
However, if by “forgive and forget” one
means, “I will act as if the sin had never occurred and live as if I
don’t remember it,” then we can run into trouble.
For example, a rape
victim can choose to forgive the rapist, but that does not mean
she should act as if that sin had never happened. To spend time alone
with the rapist, especially if he is unrepentant, is not what
Forgiveness involves not holding a sin against a person any
longer, but forgiveness is different from trust. It is wise to take
precautions, and sometimes the dynamics of a relationship will have to
The ideal is to forgive and forget. Love keeps no record of wrongs .
However, changing hearts is God’s business, and, until an offender has a
true, supernatural heart change, it is only wise to limit the level of
trust one places in that person. Being cautious doesn’t mean we haven’t
forgiven. It simply means we are not God and we cannot see that person’s